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Talking about Tiger Mother again

7已有 635 次阅读  2014-09-15 00:02   标签education  something  children  about  style 

I’d like to discuss about the education of children for long time and have got a chance to write something today.

 

There was an argument about Tiger Mother years ago. It was the difference between west and east about education of children. Tiger Mother is a Chinese American and along with the traditional Chinese custom that every Chinese parents want their kids to have great achievement. She is severe with her kids that they have to study hard and get good results in school and also in music and sport.

 

However in West Country, for instant, most of British parents don’t put any pressure on their children. What will be will be is their principle. No plenty home works, no extra lessons after school, no music lessons except what the kid is really interested in. The British children much more enjoy their childhood rather than Chinese children. The Chinese children always have much more stress to study from their parents, and leave them no time to play football, go to the cinema or such things. All what they are doing is studying hard since the primary school until the high school.

 

As a Chinese mother, I was a witness to my son growing up in China. He was in tears all time when I sent him to the kindergarten which specially makes little kids learning more Chinese words as he was age 4. He was showing no interest about piano lessons that cost me a lot to buy a piano and paid for the lessons. In the end, I decided that I will give him a free childhood. I stopped the piano lessons, sent him to the normal kindergarten. He was happy. But when he started the primary school he was well behind his classmates. They already knew the most of Chinese words in their text books. My son didn’t know any. I was guilty about that. As a Chinese parent it’s such hard to make a choice for their kids. Either you are following the majority to make the kids study early or you take a risk to the traditional Chinese dream which want your children to be a success, wealthy and powerful.

 

I admire the British kids who have a good time in their childhood. But John’s story made me wonder that the British education system is a success.

 

John has graduated in the British secondary school. It’s not good results but qualified. But he hardly writes, spells and thinks. Because his parents spoilt him so much that he can’t get up at 8:00 in the morning. There is no way he goes to work on time. He’d likes enjoying time with his friends, drinking all night till 2,3 early morning. He could completely ignore his parents’ feelings which were worrying him all time, and never give them call to tell them he was all right. He took drugs and drink all time. And he didn’t think anything wrong with it. Because he enjoyed everything he did.

 

His parents have lost control with him totally. He would not listen to them and carry on with his drugs and drink. He got a good job and gave it up because he thinks the wage is not enough. He wants to enjoy life without making much effort. He hardly looks after himself, doesn’t know how to use washing machine, or make the bed, or tide up his room. His life is in mess and he is only 19.

This is an individual story, but there are so many kids like him in this generation. All they know is enjoying life for themselves. I can’t figure out what’s wrong with the British kids. I don’t have a solution for Chinese kids either.

 

As parents we want them happy. But what is the real happy life? Now or future?

 

As Tiger Mother, her kids would feel hard when they were young, but it will be easy when they were adult. As john, he had free, easy and fulfilled childhood, but now he has paid the price for his adult life.

 

I don’t know the answer.

 

 


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  • ruitony 2014-09-17 11:55
    John is an exception. I won't be a tiger mom, but once it needed I still will tell my child what he should do.
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